You always have the man who owns a surround sound theater system at home and thinks that qualifies him to be the sound guy. You always have the one kid that's crying like he just watched someone shoot his dog before jumping on stage.
And that one kid who thinks they're the next Beyonce busting out "Up on the Rooftop" but they're really more like a Sanjaya. Or a William Hung. I was that kid. And who can forget the dead-panned-intended-to-be-funny lines delivered through a scratchy microphone?
But the spectacular part is it doesn't really matter. The kids could spin around in circles shouting "Santa Claus" until they throw up and people would still clap for them at the end. It's not about the show. Can't hear what the kids are saying? Doesn't matter. Can hear the kids and wish you couldn't? Still doesn't matter. Can the kids see you? Do they know you're their biggest fan? THAT's what matters.
See, I don't go to Christmas programs for the entertainment value. I go because there's some kids that I really care about who want me to be there. Today I got to attend one of these infamous Christmas programs. Eight of the kids from our church were in it. It was chock full of the hilarious mistakes that makes a kid's play so great. The crying kid. Snowmen doing moves from "Thriller." Reindeer and Elves doing a line dance. Mrs. Claus beating a microphone with no mercy because she inadvertently disconnected the cord.
I know it's cheesy. I know I'm overemotional and way too sentimental, but there were tears actually welling up in my eyes when I saw my kids perform. You see, one of the girls has been talking about this play for weeks. She's very special to me. She's becoming more involved with the church. She's been singing on the worship team. When she brought up the performance, she was testing the waters telling me how "silly" the song was that her class was singing. I could tell that she was looking for some validation and encouragement, so I let her know that I bet it was awesome and that I couldn't wait to see her perform.
When she stood on the risers with her class singing her heart out, my heart just about burst with pride. I saw her spot me in the crowd. Her eyes lit up. She did a little jump, squared her shoulders and sang even louder. It was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen.
I saw a little girl who wasn't broken down by the failures of her past. She wasn't held back by fear of what others would think. She wasn't remembering all the times she had been a disappointment or made mistakes previously. She was able to grasp hold of the truth that I care about her and wouldn't miss her moment for anything in the world.
I wish we could do the same. I've been reading a lot about God as the Father lately. I remember during the performance thinking "I'm a mess and these aren't even my own kids! What am I going to be like when it's my kids up there performing?" Then I started thinking about God. And us. And how our version of reality is so screwed up.
We are so broken. We are just broken pieces scattered on the floor. We are failures. We are undeserving. We can't accept God's love because we can't get over our past mistakes. We certainly don't deserve any special treatment from God. Sure, I'll let him save me. But that's it. I'll accept his grace for salvation, but surely that's all he has to give. I can't accept his blessing on my life. I can't accept that he may actually have something good planned for me. Up until now I've been on my own. I've been in the same cycle of failure. I've tried to change who I am but it's just not working. Why would he want me?
But he sees you on the stage. And his heart bursts with pride. Sure, you sing off tune. You may be the crazy crying kid. You forgot your lines. But you're HIS kid. And he's proud of you.
"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?
Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?
If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!"
Mark 7:9-11
How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!His love for you is so wide. so long. so deep. so high. Embrace it. Start living for the first time. Take a deep breath, square your shoulders, and sing.
1 John 3:1a
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